I am trying to recall how it is like last-last semester: the workload, the never-ending avalanche of assigments, camping till 6am in the MMC room with jt and geok and many more.. And i wonder how the hell i got thru everything.

Why do i feel the intense pressure now, when it is only the third week, when everything is still slack and going slow, when it is only the beginning??

I can see unpromising days looming ahead, so inevitable, so helpless, so threatening, so so.....
And i so very welcome any form of transient emancipation, be it just a few seconds, because seriously, i am desperate for it.

I miss how i enjoyed school even though things were tough. I miss how stressful it felt but i never thought of giving up. I miss how things got screwed up but i still pushed on in life.

I am living in constant fear everyday.
I pray for the courage to face yet another tomorrow.

god, please save me.